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The Blog

Lessons from Infancy: Cry Baby, Cry

Emily Porta

From time to time, people sit in my office and cry. But then, they apologize for it, feel embarrassed, overwhelmed and insecure by the tears streaming down their face. Tears have a voice. They are saying something too. Infants have no troubles crying. It is how they communicate. There are different cries for different needs or emotions. And just like infants, we cry differently depending on the emotion. Have you ever laughed with a friend until you cried. Oh! What a wonderful feeling! Or have you ever been so overwhelmed that words could not express and so you cried, relieving so much tension. That is a good feeling as well. 

The other day I heard a little boy say to his father, "you know you are tough if you don't cry. I am tough." His father kinda blew him of. What an opportunity to teach! Actually, it is brave to cry as an adult. We feel childlike often when we cry, but it is a primal thing to do. This comes back to being comfortable in our own skin with our own feelings. 

If you ever come to my counseling office, I have 3 boxes of tissues, because I am comfortable with the tears. Being a therapist means listening to them, as they each fall and understanding what they are trying to convey. So next time you need to cry, do it. Don't apologize. Feelings are feelings, they don't need an apology, they need to be expressed.