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Relationships are messy + delicious. Learn about how Robyn D'Angelo, The Happy Couple Expert uses science to effectively help couples in Orange County, California to master the messiness of couplehood, together.

The Blog

What if....

Emily Porta

What if tomorrow things fell apart? What if, you didn't get what you wanted in life? What if you tried something to only find out that it wasn't the right thing for you?

What is your "what if?"  

I hear it, I say it and it is one of the most common phrases to man kind. It is the language of self defeat. It speaks to fear. It creates barriers. Yet we cling to it so tightly. We want nothing more than to know that whatever we decide that it will "work," be a "success" or the "right thing." What does all of that mean anyhow? 

Sure, I had a few boyfriends in my lifetime. Were they complete failures? If I hadn't dated them, then I probably would not have found my now husband. Does that mean those past relationships were successes or lost causes? No! They were all part of the journey and part of my story. 

When you are struggling with a decision, look at the "what ifs" that are getting in the way. Ask yourself, does it really help you. "What ifs" can open you up to possibilities and opportunity, but often we use it to create fear and indecision. Therapy can help you eradicate the fear and squash the "what ifs". As we dissect the "what if" we see what it really means... "I am scared", "I don't have a voice in what I want" or "I am angry." Once you start understanding the barriers they lose their power and free you up to other possibilities. 

Life is full of opportunity. Don't let the "what if" stop you from discovering your potential.