People claim to know the tricks, secrets and tips to having a long lasting, loving, committed relationship. According to Dr.s Julie and John Gottman, there's really just one thing at the foundation of an AWESOME relationship: Knowing who you're with.
KNOWING YOUR PARTNER.
Yep, that's it. Secret is out! Just take the time to get to know who you're with. And I mean, deeply get to know them.
You may be wondering, how exactly do you get to know your partner more than you already do. I mean, you know that she loves cream and 3 sugars in her piping hot, french press coffee. You know he folds his pants in thirds before he puts them in the drawer, second from the bottom on the right. That's some pretty detailed stuff. But is it enough?
USE LOVE MAPS TO LEARN MORE.
Slow down and make time to have one-on-one conversations. Using love maps can be really fun. They can be shared on date nights, through playful texts, on road trips, and anytime you two have each other's attention. Love maps help you find out things like what their dreams are, their fears are, their goals are. They help you talk about what your favorite birthday was and why, who your 2 best friends are and what your current worries in life are.
Want a sneak peak? Here are just a few
Love Map questions:
• What makes your partner feel most complete?
• What turns your partner on?
• What is their favorite meal?
• What is their favorite was to spend the evening?
• What is their favorite color?
• What personal improvements do they want to make in their life?
• What kind of present would they like best?
• What was one of their best childhood experiences?
• What was their favorite vacation?
• What is one of their favorite & most effective ways to be soothed when upset or sad?
One important aspect of loving your partner is to become mentally familiar with their world. Remember when you first started getting to know your partner? You would sit with them for hours and ask question after question. It is an exciting part of the courtship process. Just like with anything else, things change; old information must be replaced with new knowledge.
Here's your chance to either update your current Love Maps or create brand new ones. What did you learn about your partner from using Love Maps? Did you create you own? How did you use them?
WANT MORE LOVE MAPS? Call me and let's work together to build or update your love maps. 714-390-1652 - I can help!