Hi, Robyn D'Angelo here, The Happy Couple Expert. Have you ever heard that saying: "There's no ‘I' in Team?" Well, I’m here to tell you that there absolutely is an "I" in team and it's a really important role.
When I think about the "I" in team, I think about this word 'autonomy,' which is hugely important within relationships. Autonomy is having the free will to make choices according to your wants, needs and desires.
This is really important to have within a relationship, just as important as to have your partners back, to support your partner, to cheer them on in really encourage them. There's got to be a sense of self within a relationship.
Have you ever noticed that when your partner tells you to do something, even if it's something you totally want to do, you have this sense of resistance? This kind of thought of like, "why are they telling me to do this?" It's because you're sense of being able to make a choice is removed from the situation. Our brains don't like that!
I mean, think about it, for decades and decades people have been fighting for freedom. Our brains are like that too even within relationships.
There's studies that show dissatisfaction among doctors. It's not because they have to fill out insurance forms or paperwork- it's when they feel like they don't have control over their day or how many patients they see, about how many breaks they get to take. That's where their sense of dissatisfaction is.
So, think about your relationship. Think about the areas that could be a little bit better. Is there a space to create some more autonomy? Or to deepen the autonomy that you already have within your relationship?
If this is something that you struggle with, reach out, I'd love to work with you and help you and your partner get to a place where the "I" in team can be a really, really fabulous place.
Alright, talk to you guys soon. Buh-bye!