HEY THERE!  I'M SO GLAD YOU STOPPED BY!

NOT SURE WHERE TO BEGIN CREATING YOUR EPIC RELATIONSHIP OR BUILDING THE LIFE YOU'VE ALWAYS WANTED? FILL OUT THE CONTACT FORM ON THIS PAGE & LET'S FIND YOUR STARTING LINE TOGETHER!

IF YOU'RE READY TO MAKE EPIC CHANGES NOW, CLICK HERE TO SCHEDULE YOUR FREE 15 MINUTE CONSULT!

I LOOK FORWARD TO MEETING YOU SOON!

-Robyn

23151 Verdugo Drive, Suite 201
Laguna Hills, CA 92653

714-390-1652

Relationships are messy + delicious. Learn about how Robyn D'Angelo, The Happy Couple Expert uses science to effectively help couples in Orange County, California to master the messiness of relationships while learning how to love + be loved, better.

The Blog

Filtering by Tag: relationship help

Relationship Rehab with Robyn: Making Time to Be Married

Emily Porta

How are you making time for this today?

I want to ask you something.  I want to know, how are you making time to be married today?  We make time to do all sorts of things every single day.  We make time to be parents.  We make time to be employees, show up to work.  We make time to get down on the ground and, you know, play with our dogs or our cats.  We make time to do so many things throughout our day, but do you actually make the effort to be married?  And this can look like so many different things, but I just want to tell you a story that really inspired me to make this video today.  See if this can inspire you as well.  Everyday I see a couple from my window in my office walk up and down this short little block holding hands.  They stop at the corner, give each other a little kiss, turn and walk to the end, kiss and part.  And I was watching this for months and I thought, I have to ask them what's their deal?  What's their story?  And I did, and I ran out there and said "Oh, nice to meet you.  This is who I am and you're so inspiring.  What's your story?"  They work for the same company that got split into two different buildings and they wanted to make it a point to connect everyday, to not lose that interaction that they have when they're in the same office.  Now, you may not be able to do that with your partner, but you can make it a point to show up and be married.  How are you doing that today?  I want to hear from you.  Leave a comment below or just reach out to me at robyn@counselinglagunahills.com. 

You've Got Questions? We've Got Answers!

Emily Porta

Don’t you wish you wish you could just get a therapist on the phone and ask those burning questions about why your partner does that thing, or why you always get so frustrated & flip out, why you two always have the same fight over and over ... Well, here is your chance!

Rebecca Wong and I are really excited to join forced to bring you a relationship Q and A style webinar. Rebecca is a psychotherapist and connectfulness coach in private practice in New Paltz, NY who specializes in helping parenting couples learn to integrate playfulness into their relationships to deepen their connection and intimacy.

We want you to be a part of the webinar!

So gather all those questions you’ve always wanted to ask a relationship expert, I'm sure there's more there than you think!  Now’s your chance to ask and get advice you can trust.  The webinar is free, all you have to do to join us is share your questions with us HERE by August 24th.

Your most burning questions will fuel this webinar.

We are eager to hear all that stuff you wonder about and help you find your way towards enjoying fun, satisfying, healthy, sustainable relationships that fill you up rather than deplete you. We know you want that, or more of that, or to make sure that continues… (we all do, you're not alone!)

The webinar will be held on August 28th at 11am PST/2pm EST and we invite you to join us, LIVE. And before you ask, yes, we’re planning to record also, so if you can’t be on the call with us we would still love for you to submit your questions! That said, being live with us makes it all so much more fun!

No question is too big or too small.  We want ’em all and we can not wait to hear what you've got for us!!! Matter of fact, we can’t do this without you.

If this relationship Q & A webinar sounds as exciting to you as it does to us, please share, sign up & submit your burning juicy relationship questions to us by August 24th.

We’ll send you more information about how to log on as the date approaches, just sign up and submit your questions to make sure you are on the list!

We can't wait to see you on the 28th! 

-R&R

Don't Let Anxiety Kill Your Relationship

Emily Porta

Anxiety in a relationship is challenging and here are three things YOU can do to ensure it doesn't kill your relationship. 

Did these help you? I'd love to hear from you! Leave a comment below or email me directly. If you're in the Laguna Hills, California area and you'd like to know more about how to create a happier and healthier relationship - I'd love to work with you directly. (714) 390-1652.

Don't Let Facebook Ruin Your Relationship!

Emily Porta

There are many things you can do to enjoy social media without it messing up your relationship - here are just a few of those. Check out this video and learn 3 tips for you and your partner to stay plugged in without disconnecting.

Did these help you? I'd love to hear from you! Leave a comment below or email me directly

Transcription:

Hi.  Robyn D'Angelo here, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Relationship Specialist.  Today I'm talking about relationships and social media.  More importantly, how to create some boundaries within your relationship so that Facebook especially does not mess up your relationship and the bond between you and your partner.  I'm going to give you three rules.  The first rule is don't over-share on Facebook with your posts.  And that can be good stuff and bad stuff.  It's really important to learn what is your partner's comfort level with how much you share on Facebook.  They may not feel comfortable knowing or having your whole social world--family, friends--know that they made you a nice romantic candlelit dinner last night wearing only an apron.  They also may be really uncomfortable if you're sharing details of a fight you had.  That can feel really vulnerable to your partner.  So, taking time to have a conversation before you're posting things about your partner's comfort level.  And really getting that established so that you're setting those boundaries.  The second rule is do not stay actively in touch with exes.  And I may get some slack for this but sometimes people can definitely keep--maintain healthy relationships with exes but I think it's important to talk to your partner about this.  If you are connected with your ex through Facebook or a number of exes, think about why you are still connected with them.   What is it about the relationship that gets your needs met that maybe your current relationship does not.  And what would happen if your partner was doing the same thing?  Would it upset you?  Again, everyone's answers to this are going to be different, but it's important to start having this conversation with your partner to really get some boundaries established.  The last rule, third and final rule, is avoid at all costs if you can those passive aggressive posts.  So this looks like, say you see your friends have gone out on a romantic date and you end up posting beneath the beautiful picture or whatever the comment is, you know, "Boy, it sure would be nice to have a date night."  Your partner can see that and it can be really hurtful.  It can actually trigger insecurities.  It can drive a wedge between the two of you and the point of being in a relationship is to stay emotionally connected.  Again, what I recommend is talking directly to your partner.  If there's things that you would like to happen more in your relationship, it requires a conversation.  Our partners are not mind readers.  So those are just three things to keep in mind when it comes to social media and setting boundaries.  Which is be careful not to over-share, not staying connected to exes on Facebook, and then avoiding those passive-aggressive posts.  If this has been helpful, great.  I'd love to hear from you.  Leave a comment below or you can email me at robyn@therapywithrobyn.com.  I'd love to hear from you.  Take care.

The Magic 5 Hours - Keepin' it Fresh

Emily Porta

It only takes 5 hours a week to recalibrate your relationship - check it out. Did these help you? I'd love to hear from you! Leave a comment below or email me directly at

If you're in the Laguna Hills, California area and you'd like to know more about how to keep your relationship fun, connected and fresh, call me - I'd love to work with you directly. (714) 390-1652.

Transcription:

Hi. Robyn D'Angelo here, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Relationship Specialist.   And today I'm going to be answering a question that comes up often in my office from couples and individuals, which is how much time should we, as a couple, be spending a week to keep our relationship fresh, to keep it on point?  And according to Julie and John Gottman of the Gottman Institute, they have come up with the magic five hours per week. And that consists of five different things. The first thing being partings. So, when you leave your partner, you know, for the day, the goal here is to find out one interesting thing about their day. What's going to happen? What do they have planned? Who are they gonna see that day? And then see if you can squeeze in there a six second kiss. This is something that John Gottman says is "a kiss full of possibilities." It can make you late to work--one of those good ones. So, that's the first one, is partings.  The second is reunions. Think about when you walk into a room full of friends or you show up to a party and people just light up. How good does that feel? Would it be possible for you to do that for your partner when they come in after, maybe, a long day? Or think of how great it would feel for them to just get super excited after seeing--you know, after being away all day and seeing you. Whether you've been, you know, with the kids or at work, at school--whatever it is. See if you can create an environment of excitement upon reuniting. And the third thing is admiration and fondness. And this makes me think of the story of the Swedish farmer who loved his wife so much that, one day, he almost told her. All right. It goes to the point of you have to do more than you think loving and kind thoughts. You have to make it a point to tell your partner the things that you appreciate about them and what you love about them. The goal here is to have two appreciations a day, and that will look different depending on what your partner's love language is. And we'll cover that at a later date. The fourth one is affection. So, there's been research on attachment that shows when people go in to get an MRI, if they're in there with their partner holding their hand, they--their stress levels, their anxiety is reduced significantly and it even predicts that they'll have lower levels of pain. How powerful is that? That's just from touch. So this shows that gentle touch from your partner can really heal and get you through really tough times. So make it a point to have affection, have touch and play, and really connect in this way. And the last thing is weekly dates. This is so important. Make it a point to spend two hours with your partner a week. So, no one else, no screens. Keep it really intense, with your focus and attention on each other. The best gift you can give your partner is time. So, I hope this has been helpful. If it has, great. Leave a comment below or you can contact me directly. And if you have questions or you'd like to know more, since this is obviously just a tidbit on how to stay connected and keep your relationship fresh, please call me directly at 714-390-1652. Or you can email me at robyn@therapywithrobyn.com. Talk to you again soon.

[Transcribed by NMS]

Top 10 Ways to Improve Your Relationships Now!

Emily Porta

Can you really surmise improving relationships in 10 bullet points? Well, I think this is a great starting point. You will note the title isn't top things the other person can do to make your relationship better. Nope, change starts with you. This is the hard part, the piece that we often cringe at facing. What is your responsibility? 

You can't control the actions of others. You can't predict the behaviors of others. That leaves you with you. Only you can make changes. They will inevitably impact the other person and from that you can decide what you want to do in the relationship. You actually are only responsible for you - owning your feelings, thoughts and behaviors.

So, if you would like my Top 10 list, then join my newsletter here. I also include other fun tidbits on a monthly basis of ways to help transform your life.

Is Counseling Right for Me?

Emily Porta

Ever wonder at what point you should get some counseling? I want to make this very simple. Ask yourself this question - Is whatever that is going on, interrupting the way you want your life to be?

You don't have to wait until you feel like you are in crisis. Sometimes, brief counseling is helpful to address issues. But don't be surprised if you start counseling and find that it helps other areas of your life too! You might end up wanting to keep on working on creating a better you!

Counseling can help you with your relationships, your career, and most importantly it can greatly impact the way you feel! If you feel ready to make a change, then you are ready to try counseling. Don't wait. If you live in the Laguna Hills area, give me a call 714-390-1652.